Your first question may be …. what is a mommymoon and how do I get one. If your thinking of some secret beach getaway, with a bunch of other moms running around free from all responsibility then sorry to disappoint but that’s not really what I mean, but hey I would gladly join you on this secret getaway anytime!!! Mommymoon was a term I came up with the first time I had a rough day after my son was born. Now I was a lucky mom, and please don’t think I don’t know it, who had a baby who was pretty laid back, easy going and just kind of went with the flow. Whether it be because we try to behi laid back with him or it is just the type of person he will be we know we scored the baby jackpot. From day one this kid wanted to sleep through the night if I would let him, was really alert and aware of what was going on around him and just all in all was easy. I luckily didn’t have any issues breastfeeding him, except my first day I brought him home from the hospital. I have had mommy friends who have shared horror stories of being up every hour having to feed and babies with reflux that just wont stop crying in discomfort. I was lucky and had smooth sailing.
I cried when I had to go back to work, thinking ” I am going to miss it all, every milestone here on out I wont get to see!” Which of course is silly. Sure some milestones I had to watch on Skype but many and most milestones kind of happen more gradually then I think us first time moms realize. I mean they don’t just start running around the house in a day ! Everyday he was happy to see me when I got home. Everyday we laughed and played when I was off he even slept in til 9 am most days. Teething troubles you say…. nope not for us (again luckily because we all know that teething is like the worst thing ever!!). We rolled and crawled our way into fun times. We stayed free from colds and flus. We ate with no concerns and enjoyed even eating our veggies. At nine and a half months I had my first weekend away from him, and as if that wasn’t hard enough I was in a totally different state. We video messaged and he would kiss the phone and it was all roses and candy hearts. Life was amazing. Our little boy and our lives had just transitioned into one another perfectly. I truly felt as if we never even sacrificed anything, we just added him to our plans and life was grand.
Then one unsuspecting Tuesday morning when my son was ten and a half months old the Mommymoon ended. As weird as it seems, I remember this day so well. I woke up just like every other day but this morning it was not to my normal smiling baby as per usual, today it was to a hysterical child. Trying to get breakfast ready was a mission. Every time I would leave him and let go of his hand a battle of epic proportions broke out. Even in between spoonful’s of food there were sobs. Of course I immediately took his temperature, even though he didn’t feel warm to me. Nope, no fever. I then thought hhmm… let me check for new teeth. Nope only the same two little bottom teeth poking out at me. Diapers were checked, body was checked every nook and cranny was inspected all resulting in one conclusion. Nothing was wrong, everything appeared normal. Now before I continue let me say this is not one of those stories were something crazy happens and some secret issue was underlying and here I am telling my story of warning. The only warning this blog has in it for you is to warn you, actually just to prepare you for the day the Mommymoon ends!!
The hysterics persisted for hours, and no this isn’t an exaggeration of like 30 minutes that felt like hours. No this is truly hours of hysterical screaming and sobbing and whining for hours for no reason at all. I wanted to call the pediatrician and bring him in, I mean kids just don’t cry for no reason right? Wrong, apparently babies can just cry for no reason other then they are babies haha. Trying to go down for a nap that day … crying. Trying to play that day…crying. He just didn’t want me to leave him or let go of his hand for the entire day. This is enough to make any sane person go to the brink of insanity. Finally after 45 minutes of sitting on the floor next to his crib holding his hand until he fell asleep I remember thinking to my self, ” well I guess the honeymoon phase of motherhood has officially ended” and thus the term Mommymoon was born.
My Mommymoon had lasted 10 and a half glorious months and just a quickly as it had been with us it suddenly disappeared. It was the first time, as a mom that I felt like I failed. I had failed at making my baby calm down, I had failed at doing the mom thing with a smile on my face at all times, I had just felt like I failed. In this moment that I felt at my worst I came to a true epiphany, I didn’t fail I was just like every other mom in the world who had a bad day with their baby. For the first time I realized that some days will be good days and some days will be bad days. Remembering to not beat your self up when you have a bad days is so important because it is so easy to do. So when when you have that break up with your Mommymoon don’t fret, don’t cry. Well cry a little but then remind your self you are an awesome mom and everything is going to be ok. Most importantly you are doing an awesome job even at the times when you don’t feel like you are !!!!